Um, where am I?

I didn't date much in high school. Mostly just a guy-friend to the banquets or movies with a group. Thought it was pretty much a waste of my valuable time. I always knew it would "just happen" for me. I’d meet a guy that was a great friend and one day lightening would strike and we would know.

I was 18 when I met D. We weren’t friends right off; I thought he was to egotistical. But we had all the same friends and soon became really good friends ourselves. One day, I was a month shy of 20, he just sort of started talking about how wonderful I was, and how he had never really realized what he was missing in all his relationships, but "IT" was there when he was with me...and I sure looked pretty today...he never wanted to say how pretty he thought I was sooner, because he valued our friendship...did I want to go back to his place, cause Chad was going to bed soon, but didn't I want to see that new movie he bought...

I was already so in love with him, this was the answer to my prayers right? I even let him talk me into sleeping with him…I mean, he had to truly love me, cause we were best friends right? GEEZ! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It meant he knew what I wanted to hear, and he knew I was good for HIM, but that didn't mean it was a real relationship.

D was, still is, my best friend too... I used to listen to him for hours about his girl problems. Eventually, it did seem D woke up and "realized" I was the one. Looking back, he just hit a "dry-spell" and Lord knows he cannot be alone. There I was waiting to love him and take care of him. So I did. I even forgave him for when he was "weak" and saw other girls. After all I knew him sooo well and knew he was sorry and really loved me, cause we were best friends... Basically, all this means is I should have known better, but I blinded by friendship and love. (And not blinded in the good way.)

I agree your husband should be your best friend, but that develops with the relationship...not the relationship developing from the friendship (ESPECIALLY if he is talking about other girls!!!).

Here I am, 10 years later, with a husband who can not stay faithful to save his soul, literally! Two little kids, and facing a divorce and starting all over. And I am not only loosing my husband and lover, but also my "best friend". And that may be the hardest part... the man I used to watch movies with and talk for hours about music or books... But I loose him because it was not solid to begin with. It never could have been... I was a fall back, a safety net for him. I still am! He never viewed me as the
"prize" he had attained. He didn't "get" me, I laid in wait for him. Next time, if there is one in God's plan, the man will have to come after me! Lesson learned.